Archive for February, 2007

farewell for a while.

February 21, 2007

tonight at church we discussed lent. i do hope that many people from our community will participate in some type of lenten discipline. not because i think there is something magical about it, but just because i think we all need to stop some times and remember. like the israelites who were leaving bondage and heading towards the promised land, we forget. stop trusting. start rebelling. for a while now, i have been in a weird space. there are a few things i am putting aside this season in order to become more reliant on someone outside of myself (who ironically says he is within me). i need to know discomfort. awareness. discipline… among other things.

so… i am saying goodbye to the internet, aside from basic e-mail capability and occasional pertinent research. those who need to get in touch with me can still do so via e-mail or my many phone options. i will be reading a lot more. (i bought The Brothers Karamazov today, i am that resolved!. journaling a lot more. spending time with people a lot more. talking on the phone a lot more. praying a lot more. its a good thing.

i am saying goodbye to sugar. this is going to be hard for me. i have battled food issues for a long time (honestly, what girl hasn’t) and as a person who sort of has a slight addiction to sweets, i need to see that i can do without them and the “comfort” they provide.

for those of you interested in the season of lent, mars hill has great resources available here. i will be following along with them for my own lent journey. ruth hailey barton, a spiritual director and teacher, also sent out a great e-mail from the transforming center to subscribers regarding lent that i will be forwarding to some of you, as no link is available.

blessings to you all as we all look forward to celebrating the resurrection of our Lord and Savior 🙂 i think this year it will be significantly different for me and i look forward to entering into this time more intentionally than ever before. (easy to say now as i am still typing on my blog and eating candy. ha.)

i leave you with these thoughts on Lent that i cannot say better myself, taken from Ruth Hailey Barton on Lent:

“in a very intentional way we invite God to search us and know us and to (eventually) lead us into resurrection life… facing our sin in the shadow of Christ’s cross and impeding resurrection is the healthiest way to deal with our sin. the disciples of fasting and other kinds of abstinence help us to face the hold our sin patterns have on us and to somehow let go. i don’t want to just give up chocolate because i like chocolate and God is the curmudgeon in the sky who wants to keep it from me. i want to enter into lenten disciplines that correspond to the places in my life that cry out for deeper levels of transformation. the dynamics of lent have to do with abstaining from the ways we normally distract ourselves from spiritual reality- the reality of our sin and the deeply patterned behaviors that keep us from our calling to follow Christ. it has to do with allowing some of the external trappings of our lives to be stripped awayso that we can find our true idenity and calling in God once again. it has to do with acknowledging the subtle temptations to which we are prone rather than pretending we are beyond temptation. it has to do with facing the spiritual reality of the battle that satan is waging for our souls… we fast from what is material and temporal so that the inner person can be filled with the power of the Spirit.”

see you guys in april. 🙂

farewell for a while.

February 21, 2007

tonight at church we discussed lent. i do hope that many people from our community will participate in some type of lenten discipline. not because i think there is something magical about it, but just because i think we all need to stop some times and remember. like the israelites who were leaving bondage and heading towards the promised land, we forget. stop trusting. start rebelling. for a while now, i have been in a weird space. there are a few things i am putting aside this season in order to become more reliant on someone outside of myself (who ironically says he is within me). i need to know discomfort. awareness. discipline… among other things.

so… i am saying goodbye to the internet, aside from basic e-mail capability and occasional pertinent research. those who need to get in touch with me can still do so via e-mail or my many phone options. i will be reading a lot more. (i bought The Brothers Karamazov today, i am that resolved!. journaling a lot more. spending time with people a lot more. talking on the phone a lot more. praying a lot more. its a good thing.

i am saying goodbye to sugar. this is going to be hard for me. i have battled food issues for a long time (honestly, what girl hasn’t) and as a person who sort of has a slight addiction to sweets, i need to see that i can do without them and the “comfort” they provide.

for those of you interested in the season of lent, mars hill has great resources available here. i will be following along with them for my own lent journey. ruth hailey barton, a spiritual director and teacher, also sent out a great e-mail from the transforming center to subscribers regarding lent that i will be forwarding to some of you, as no link is available.

blessings to you all as we all look forward to celebrating the resurrection of our Lord and Savior 🙂 i think this year it will be significantly different for me and i look forward to entering into this time more intentionally than ever before. (easy to say now as i am still typing on my blog and eating candy. ha.)

i leave you with these thoughts on Lent that i cannot say better myself, taken from Ruth Hailey Barton on Lent:

“in a very intentional way we invite God to search us and know us and to (eventually) lead us into resurrection life… facing our sin in the shadow of Christ’s cross and impeding resurrection is the healthiest way to deal with our sin. the disciples of fasting and other kinds of abstinence help us to face the hold our sin patterns have on us and to somehow let go. i don’t want to just give up chocolate because i like chocolate and God is the curmudgeon in the sky who wants to keep it from me. i want to enter into lenten disciplines that correspond to the places in my life that cry out for deeper levels of transformation. the dynamics of lent have to do with abstaining from the ways we normally distract ourselves from spiritual reality- the reality of our sin and the deeply patterned behaviors that keep us from our calling to follow Christ. it has to do with allowing some of the external trappings of our lives to be stripped awayso that we can find our true idenity and calling in God once again. it has to do with acknowledging the subtle temptations to which we are prone rather than pretending we are beyond temptation. it has to do with facing the spiritual reality of the battle that satan is waging for our souls… we fast from what is material and temporal so that the inner person can be filled with the power of the Spirit.”

see you guys in april. 🙂

drowning on dry land

February 16, 2007

i’m in a blogging slump. i don’t really mind it though. i’m working more, beginning my training for some big runs, and also trying to get to bed earlier. that said, i haven’t spent as much time in front of my laptop recently. come ash wednesday you will see me taking a haitus from here for quite a while, as i am giving up a couple things for lent this year, one of which being spending time on-line. i will still check my e-mail and use the internet for church-related things, but no AIM, no blogging/reading blogs, no viewing of the latest grey’s anatomy episode’s music, no facebook (which i suspended in lieu of lent), etc… i am quite excited to do this actually. i think it will be a great time in my life and have several plans for the lent season.

but… back to grey’s. (if you haven’t seen it there is a slight spoiler to follow) i won’t lie. i am hopelessly addicted. ever since the fall of ’05 when i was sick one day at school, i ventured outside my dorm to a local blockbuster. no movie proved worthy of renting so i wandered to the t.v. section and thought “hmmm, didn’t grey’s anatomy win some award?” being one who appreciates such things, i decided to rent it… after watching the first season in 2 days (sick, i know) i was hooked. i got all caught up and now its the middle of the 3rd season and tonight was intense. i’m still not over it. in fact, i even looked up hypothermia afterwards on wikipedia to see what could possibly be happening to meredith. i don’t care if you think i’m lame. besides, most of you were probably watching it and wondering the same thing as well. (p.s. derek is officially my hero. patrick dempsey is a great actor.)

nothing else to say at this point. the show totally put me in a solemn mood. a few recent events: i am reading a great book right now. it makes me want to go visit a synagogue. ordered rob bell’s latest. my nose ring fell out. (strangely, i don’t mind. this is the second time, so i’m thinking its a sign). my managers at starbucks want to promote me to a shift supervisor position soon which is quite cool, i think. 🙂 i downloaded the new bloc party cd. it’s pretty great. really good running music. anxiously awaiting the new ones by maria taylor, rosie thomas, and arcade fire.

ttfn- tata for now.

drowning on dry land

February 16, 2007

i’m in a blogging slump. i don’t really mind it though. i’m working more, beginning my training for some big runs, and also trying to get to bed earlier. that said, i haven’t spent as much time in front of my laptop recently. come ash wednesday you will see me taking a haitus from here for quite a while, as i am giving up a couple things for lent this year, one of which being spending time on-line. i will still check my e-mail and use the internet for church-related things, but no AIM, no blogging/reading blogs, no viewing of the latest grey’s anatomy episode’s music, no facebook (which i suspended in lieu of lent), etc… i am quite excited to do this actually. i think it will be a great time in my life and have several plans for the lent season.

but… back to grey’s. (if you haven’t seen it there is a slight spoiler to follow) i won’t lie. i am hopelessly addicted. ever since the fall of ’05 when i was sick one day at school, i ventured outside my dorm to a local blockbuster. no movie proved worthy of renting so i wandered to the t.v. section and thought “hmmm, didn’t grey’s anatomy win some award?” being one who appreciates such things, i decided to rent it… after watching the first season in 2 days (sick, i know) i was hooked. i got all caught up and now its the middle of the 3rd season and tonight was intense. i’m still not over it. in fact, i even looked up hypothermia afterwards on wikipedia to see what could possibly be happening to meredith. i don’t care if you think i’m lame. besides, most of you were probably watching it and wondering the same thing as well. (p.s. derek is officially my hero. patrick dempsey is a great actor.)

nothing else to say at this point. the show totally put me in a solemn mood. a few recent events: i am reading a great book right now. it makes me want to go visit a synagogue. ordered rob bell’s latest. my nose ring fell out. (strangely, i don’t mind. this is the second time, so i’m thinking its a sign). my managers at starbucks want to promote me to a shift supervisor position soon which is quite cool, i think. 🙂 i downloaded the new bloc party cd. it’s pretty great. really good running music. anxiously awaiting the new ones by maria taylor, rosie thomas, and arcade fire.

ttfn- tata for now.

i hope its a garden.

February 12, 2007

God, let her listen
With ears to the ground.
Let voiceless approval
Turn into sound.

In death there are hidden, invisible keys
That only when swallowed
Reveal where they lead.

Life is a mess
We wake up to,
A single thread of a deeper truth.

Is this a graveyard
To bury her heart?
Or is it a garden,
Where new life will start.

‘Cause God, when life here ends,
We’ll beg you for more.
In temper we’ll hate you,
But please keep no score.

Life, it is a mess we wake up to,
A single thread of a deeper truth.

sleeping at last keep no score

i hope its a garden.

February 12, 2007

God, let her listen
With ears to the ground.
Let voiceless approval
Turn into sound.

In death there are hidden, invisible keys
That only when swallowed
Reveal where they lead.

Life is a mess
We wake up to,
A single thread of a deeper truth.

Is this a graveyard
To bury her heart?
Or is it a garden,
Where new life will start.

‘Cause God, when life here ends,
We’ll beg you for more.
In temper we’ll hate you,
But please keep no score.

Life, it is a mess we wake up to,
A single thread of a deeper truth.

sleeping at last keep no score

can i take your, um, order?

February 3, 2007

so its friday night. its almost 11 p.m. and i just got home since leaving after 8 this morning.

today was composed of babysitting for the majority of the day, transitting to work, and then working til 10 tonight. crazy.

now i know that being around people energizes me instead of exhausts me. i am wired and sitting here with a bowl of smart popcorn and Edward Norton on my t.v. staring strangely into the distance because i paused the movie.

starbucks is great. every day i am training something awesome happens. tonight i got to try the scary drive thru headset out and do the drive thru customers. way weird at first. totally got flustered (the backstreet boy headset kinda freaked me out) and this resulted in many awkward exchanges with customers via the intercom. nice.

i also brewed a lot of coffee, something i am feeling like i have a good handle on. except tonight i brewed one batch onto the counter tops instead. i am talking a LOT of coffee, sort of river-esque. you see, i heard this pouring sound as i was doing other things and was like what IS that? and as i noticed the ridiculous amount of brown liquid that had taken over the coffee brewing area i stood there in shock. it hit me finally to do something about it and i realized i had not locked the machine in place so it was pouring EVERYWHERE and had been for like 3 minutes. 20 coffee-soaked towels later and a fresh brew going (locked and loaded) it was all over. everyone made me feel better because apparently i am not the only one this has happened to. good.

now i am home, about to watch a movie and feeling pretty great about life. i just noticed some mocha sauce on my arm. ah, starbucks.

can i take your, um, order?

February 3, 2007

so its friday night. its almost 11 p.m. and i just got home since leaving after 8 this morning.

today was composed of babysitting for the majority of the day, transitting to work, and then working til 10 tonight. crazy.

now i know that being around people energizes me instead of exhausts me. i am wired and sitting here with a bowl of smart popcorn and Edward Norton on my t.v. staring strangely into the distance because i paused the movie.

starbucks is great. every day i am training something awesome happens. tonight i got to try the scary drive thru headset out and do the drive thru customers. way weird at first. totally got flustered (the backstreet boy headset kinda freaked me out) and this resulted in many awkward exchanges with customers via the intercom. nice.

i also brewed a lot of coffee, something i am feeling like i have a good handle on. except tonight i brewed one batch onto the counter tops instead. i am talking a LOT of coffee, sort of river-esque. you see, i heard this pouring sound as i was doing other things and was like what IS that? and as i noticed the ridiculous amount of brown liquid that had taken over the coffee brewing area i stood there in shock. it hit me finally to do something about it and i realized i had not locked the machine in place so it was pouring EVERYWHERE and had been for like 3 minutes. 20 coffee-soaked towels later and a fresh brew going (locked and loaded) it was all over. everyone made me feel better because apparently i am not the only one this has happened to. good.

now i am home, about to watch a movie and feeling pretty great about life. i just noticed some mocha sauce on my arm. ah, starbucks.